Focus on what you want
Don’t…
Has anyone told you not to do something or not to behave a certain way and that is the one thing you are focusing on? Dieting is a great example for me. Don’t eat sugar its bad for you. So I am thinking all day about a packet of lollies and how I am not allowed to eat it. Guess what the first thing is I grab for when I am tired. Or currently, because we are not allowed to travel, so I am thinking about all the amazing destinations and things I am missing out on. I call it my FOMO (my fear of missing out). COVID is certainly testing my FOMO.
I had my Aha! moment teaching someone to ride on the weekend and they were focusing on “the don’t”. So when I asked “what are you thinking about?” and they responded, “I am thinking about not using my spurs”. They could do that for about 6 or 7 strides and then they would be doing the precise thing that they were trying not to do. “So, try replacing your don’t with a do. Let’s try thinking about using our calf and upper thigh”. It worked.
My inspiration came from listening to two podcasts only days apart about this exact thing from two different horsemen telling the exact same story just from their own point of view. Warwick Schiller’s Performance Horsemanship and Double Dan Horsemanship told the story of the blue tree. Don’t think about the Blue Tree – anyway the only thing you think about is the blue tree. Highly recommend both of their podcasts, great storytellers.
Do…
When you fill your mind with what you want and the stronger you can make the visual the easier it is to do. Try a vision and fill in the feelings, sights, sounds, and smells. The clearer the image the easier it is to create that end result. That is why sports psychologists talk about the visuals and a clear focus. Visualise the ball going through the hoop no net. If it works for elite athletes why can’t it work for you or me?
Our brains are wired to do only one thing at a time and when we create a mental picture they are brilliant at filling in the blanks and making it happen.
So I am going to practice focusing on what I want. I am going to try and replace my don’ts with my do’s.
#horse #emotionalintelligence #inspired #doing #learning #ahamoment #horses #equineassistedcoaching #focus